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GUAPOSKIN: WHAT IS IT?!?? |
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Multiple GUAPO opponents have been rendered senseless by the powerful aromas exuded by each GUAPO during the course of an evening. The array of smells, which are tailored to each GUAPO's personal skills and scentpower, often has the effect of mysteriously forcing opponents' balls to swing helplessly towards the gutter. Lab testing and scientific analysis indicate that GUAPOSMELL is caused primarily by the unique subsystems that make up GUAPOSKIN.
Below you'll find an in-depth look at GUAPOSKIN and the internal architecture that releases those nasty GUAPO aromas. This documentation is provided for the public's general interest. The GUAPOS also hope this satisfies the needs of the International Bowling Federation, which has asked LOS DIABLOS GUAPOS to document their secret smelly bowling weaponry in the interest of fairness to bowlers everywhere.
GUAPOSKIN DIAGRAM:
Here one can witness the internal diagram of GUAPOSKIN.
This depiction portrays the probing GUAPO tendril, which openly seeks the nearest sexy booty and also provides sensitive bowling data to help knock mad pins.
Secret bowling sensors embedded in GUAPOSKIN deliver vital bowling feedback to the GUAPObrain within nanoseconds, which gives the GUAPOS an edge when all systems are working in alignment.
The GUAPOSMELL is generated inside the GUAPO lovejuice duct, which is stimulated whenever the trashcan is flying, alcohol consumption increases, or hot girlies are nearby.
The GUAPO lovejuice duct then pumps approximately 7.5 cubic centimeters of GUAPOSMELL into the surrounding area per minute. Observers note that a GUAPO can, on average, completely overwhelm an opponent in less than fifteen seconds when stimulated properly.
When in near proximity to each other, the entire team of LOS DIABLOS GUAPOS emits a scent that has been shown to overpower rhesus monkeys and six-year-old children.
The GUAPOSKIN subsystem also contains a GUAPOsex activator which conducts immediate sensations to the various erogenous zones of the GUAPO. When erect, the GUAPOsex activator transmits intense sexual awareness modules throughout the GUAPO body.
Also of crucial importance to the entire GUAPOSKIN structure is alcohol. Small channels spread various forms of alcohol to all GUAPO systems within moments of intake. This intoxicating effect has been shown to play a pivotal role in over 89% of all GUAPO incidents.
The GUAPOS appreciate your interest in GUAPOSKIN and GUAPOSMELL and invite all members of the general public to smell them whenever possible.
smelly GUAPOS are the sexiest GUAPOS around