MR. ME FANTASTIC mrme@losdiablosguapos.com NAME: Mr. Me Fantastic AKA: What do you mean, AKA? I have a name for a reason. Learn it, jackass. DRINK OF CHOICE: Anything foo-foo, sissy, girlie, cherry flavored, served with an umbrella or otherwise insulting to a man's testiculary pride. AVG SCORE: I bowled a 56 while tanked-up in Memphis, while on the other hand I've rolled 200 tanked-up in league, so yeah, try and figure it out. You think you know my game? You think you can play me with all the respect you'd give a knock-off version of Tetris on your brother's Super Nintendo? Dude, besides a healthy serving of skin, sin and gin, you have no idea what you're gonna get when you face me.  BALL SIZE: 16 WAIST: Varies on the support garment HIPS: Full and tender, yet muscular and inviting. SIGN: Virgo BIRTHPLACE: The Islands TURN-ONS: Girls, girls, girls. The booty is where it's at, especially if they're into no-holds-barred fighting and "submission moves." TURN-OFFS: Boys, men, and guys. With the noteable exceptions of my 3 masked amigos, boys just tend to be vastly inferior when compared to the much lovelier corset training, mini-skirt wearing, bustier breaching alternative. If you're working on a 10 second delay, I'm talking about ladies. FAVORITE BOWLER: Mr. Me Fantastic. The dude is just awesome. FAVORITE WRESTLING MOVE: The Flying Space Tiger Driver. The name is just insane and it's used exclusively in Japan, which only adds to its mythic might. FAVORITE NON-WRESTLING MOVE: It's kind of tricky to show if we're both standing up, but I promise you'll like it. FAVORITE WRESTLER: "Favorite?" You want me to name just one wrestler, what are you nuts? I mean, jeez, to single out the Ultimo Dragon for his transcontinental triumphs (the dude held 9 belts at one time, spanning America, Mexico and Japan!) would then be disservicing Mil Mascaras, the original Man of a Thousand Masks, a man responsible for the mondo enmascarados you see on our team; style, grace, and flair all in one preening package. On the other hand, Rick "15 Time World Champion" Flair, you know? He is "The Man," and to be the man you have to beat the man, so he's beaten a man to be the man, I guess. No doubt about it, the dude is hot. Jeez, then you've got the whole von Erich clan which was as big a dynasty as anything Arron Spelling could dish out. Man, I can't answer that in good faith. I can't just single out one dude. If you've ever laced up the boots and walked the walk, you're all right with me. IDEAL EVENING: You, me, 72 open lanes and 2 tickets to WrestleMania. Plus, like a full keg of Zima and enough tiny umbrellas to go round. witness the mighty SKULL-BALL of Mr. Me Fantastic... featuring the dome of a previous unlucky opponent!